I apologize for attempting to help you get your message across clearly. Next time I will just sit back and watch you hurt your own reputation. How dare I get upset when a movement acts in a way that hurts itself? Shame on me. I am such a sexist for wanting to help.
Guy just trying to help.
Oh god, this is exactly the wrong way to go about being a dude interested in feminism.
Feminist dudes, don’t ever do this, ok? This is a prime example of “I, the man, will save you from yourself now” coupled with a healthy dose of the tone argument, topped with the privilege-denying of not having to recognize the historical implications of this sentiment.
It’s gross, and it doesn’t help at all, no matter how much you might be trying. Seriously, if passive aggression is the best you have to offer, just stop trying.
It wasn’t about interest. I had posted earlier today about how their was a more civil way to get the message across….i was called sexist. I said not one word about the message…..just how it was being delivered on the internet.
And another thing…..Not trying to save even the most…..just the few from hurting the majority. Something that all movements suffer from….would you even take issue with it if i was female? If that is the case….you are in the wrong. I just want civility on the internet….is that wrong?
Also not all feminist are women …but you should know that right?
What you were engaging is is called the tone argument, and I believe I pointed that out in my initial reblog. The tone argument is something that disproportionately affects women over men, since women are socially expected not to get upset about things (even things like, oh, you know, a little bit of oppression here and there) and if they do get upset, they are told to pipe down. The telling to pipe down is the tone argument, and it’s ridiculous. Someone’s tone doesn’t make them less right, and it’s just a convenient way for people who don’t want to analyuze their own beliefs and behaviors to say “Oh, well, you might have been right, but you didn’;t cater to me and my delicate sensibilities when saying so, so now you’re wrong” and therefore go on never having to actually face the fact that they might be espousing oppressive beliefs.
So yeah, in a nutshell, it is fucking sexist. Get over it. Inb4 second deployment of the tone argument, get over my use of the word “fucking”, too.
If you were female I’d call you a special snowflake and move on, still shaking my head. However, since you have male privilege yet still want to continue to play bullshit games about how it’s so terrible that some gal wasn’t super sweet to you when she told you that you were wrong, it is more irritating.
Civility on the internet. Oh gosh, someone was mean to you on the internet? Again, please, try being a woman with an opinion on the internet. Hope you like rape and death threats! But really, it’s the “few feminists” that need a talking to from Mr. Man about how to be nicer about their message, I’m sure. You’re doing the world such a favor.
It’s true. Not all feminists are women. Some feminists are men. But the difference is that those men don’t suck at examining their own privileges and make a concerted effort not to deny them, i.e. they don’t cry on tumblr about how the mean ol’ feminists won’t let them just fix their movement for them.
Way to miss the point twice!
It is not even tone. Let’s be honest. If someone comes up to you and starts yelling in your face about how they disagree with you, you are less likely to hear them out. If you actually want to change peoples mind you need to do it the right way. I don’t care if you are man, woman, or child. Don’t come at me in a disrespectful tone and expect me to be responsive.
Does it even matter what I say at this point?
I’m a sexist. I get it. Shame on me.
Last reblog, I promise, folks. I was just all filled with lolz.
This week on Mommyish, I took a cue from the holiday and dedicated the column to the category I’m most thankful for: Mom’s Gold Star. I don’t think a week goes by that I don’t get an email from someone saying, “Mom’s Gold Star posts are such light, funny additions to the blog. They’re my favorites!” And it’s always cool to get the submissions, because it’s basically people nominating their friends (or themselves) for being awesome. In a sea of placentas and diaper explosions, it’s nice to find some reprieve in Mom’s Gold Star submissions and reward people for using Facebook as Zuckerberg and God intended - to share information while maintaining a sense of humor. (Well, that and arguing about politics.)
As always, I’ve reserved some of my favorite submissions as an accompaniment to the Mommyish column. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I’ve got at least one submission to post that probably won’t make you smile, so get the laughs now while you can. Here are 5 Gold Stars to take you into the holiday (including a “follow-up” Mom’s Gold Star after the break!):
1. Deadpan Sass
If there’s one thing I admire in a quality joke, it’s deadpan delivery. I’m terrible at it, so I’m envious of people who are able to make simple, dry, deadpan jokes that are actually funny. Plus, I enjoy the tag team effort in this submission. Red is already winning me over, but it’s E.’s fully thought-out interpretation that earns the Gold Star. Nice work, E. That version of hide and seek is a lot less work on the parents’ part, and you guys know how I feel about laziness. It’s the next best thing to sleep!
2. Mom Of The Year
This may be one of my favorite submissions of all time, partly because I used to joke with my friends in high school about how easy it would be to kick little kids out of the way as we walked through the crowded mall, and partly because I’ve never heard a mom say something so brazenly hilarious. Expressing a willingness to hold your kid back from developmental advancements just to avoid doing extra housework equals Gold Star territory in my book. Seriously, if I were a burrito, I’d be a Lazy Supreme.